Today is the last week of the regular season. The tournament will begin next week - April 7 and will conclude on April 14. Only the top 8 teams will play in the tournament, which means in all likelihood, the Cockgnomes will be eliminated.

A note about the countdown clock:

20: There will be a 10 second shot clock (counted out audibly by the ref) to keep the game moving. The team who has the advantage - more players, or more balls in the event of an even field - must throw within 10 seconds of the ref starting the throw clock. if a throw is not made after 10 seconds then the team loses all of their balls and the throw clock starts for the other team.

Since everybody likes to interpret the rules their own way and no one is content until all rules are stretched to the point of breaking, here's how the tournament will run:

• The team with the most players has to throw before the countdown ends.


• In the event of an even field, the team with the most balls will need to throw.


• If there are even players and even balls (3/3 and 3/3 on a court), somebody must throw. If neither team throws before the clock runs down, each team will lose a player that is closest to the referee's sideline.

So what happens if one team has 6 players and 1 ball and the other team has 3 players and 5 balls? How about this? Just stop complaining and throw the damn ball. You know whose turn it is to throw? It's yours.

The referee will now be tasked with saying which team is on the clock before the countdown. They will follow the rules as stated above; however, in an uneven situation, it is their decision. Deal with it. And shut the hell up. oh, and throw the damn ball.